How the Grintch stole Christmas

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Yosser (43)

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Inside a snowflake like the one on your sleeve, there happened a story you must see to believe

It was a dark a spooky night at the night before Christmas and all the little who's were singing and
dancing around a great Christmas light bonfire. To the misery of the Grinch who was living on his
snow-cover mountain.

Every Who down in Whoville liked Christmas a lot, but the Grinch, who lived just north of Whoville - did not. The Grinch hated Christmas - the whole Christmas season. Now, please don't ask why; no one quite knows the reason. It could be, perhaps, that his shoes were too tight. Or it could be that his head wasn't screwed on just right. But I think that the most likely reason of all may have been that his heart was two sizes too small.

The Whos young and old would sit down to a feast, and they'll feast, and they'll feast.
So whatever the reason, his heart or his shoes, he stood outside his cave, hating the Whos.
The Grinch shouted:
"And they'll feast, feast, feast, feast. They'll eat their Who-Pudding and rare Who-Roast Beast.
But that's something I just cannot stand in the least."
"Oh, no. I'M SPEAKING IN RHYME!"
And the Grinch was stomping on the ground ({=stomping grounds})

"Blast this Christmas music. It's joyful and triumphant. " shouted the Grinch towards people of Who
Suddenly a shady creature came from the sky towards the Grinch
"Santa is not coming today, he's going on a holiday" said the figure with a Cheatyface
"Santa is not coming today?" the Grinch repeated in rhyme
"Well, that's horribly wrong for the people of Who"
"If they hear that, they'll go Boo-Hoo"
And the Grinch couldn't hide the biggest grin of his life across his face

And the more the Grinch thought of what Christmas would bring, the more the Grinch thought...
The Grinch: "I must stop this whole thing!"
"Why, for year after year I've put up with it now. I must stop this Christmas from coming... but how? I MEAN... in what way?"
"Oh. Bleeding hearts of the world UNITE." Shouted the Grinch into the wild
"Let's get those whos and take their delight"
"Santa is gone, it's TIME"
"To get them who make me Rhyme!"

From the Snow-Covered Forest came all kinds of Wildman
"We're gathering here for the man who wants his crewman" Said the Burning-Tree Shaman
"Those Whos make me always brainsick" Said the Mogg Fanatic
"I want to throw them in a fissure" replied the Scab-Clan Mauler
"Because of them, I failed as a Baptist" murmured Iwamori of the Open Fist
"All that merry go of those Who makes me want to take valium" rambled Rumbling Slum

On, Crasher! On, Thrasher! On, Vomit and Blitzkrieg!

As soon the not so merry go band marched towards the city of who, a strange person appeared before them
"Are you going to do what I ponder?" Asked Sarkhan Vol the planeswalker
"We are going to whosville, to scare the Whos and then we chill" the Grinch replied
"We'll end their playtime, for making me rhyme"
"Take this and make them pay" said the man and he went away
The Grinch make a funky face and thought "Maybe I should take a shower?"
"Nah..." the Grinch thought and he looked at the strange seal and item of strange fire power (Seal of Fire & Pyrite Spellbomb)

"If we reach Whoville, I'll take them Face to Face"
"I'll let them know what's their place"

As soon the not so merry go band reached the town, the Grinch said to the people of Whovile with two thumbs down:
" Well, pucker up and kiss it, Whoville."
As he puts mistletoe up to his butt and makes a taunting noise as he shakes it around
And all the Whos felt in awe.
"Charge!" shouted the Grinch "I want them RAW"
All of the band unleashed their furry upon the citizens
And all the Whos fled to their cabins

"Oh, the Who-manity." Said the Grinch badly

"Santa is not here to give you a good time"
"You'll repay for making me rhyme"
"I have these special presents just for you"
"I have presents for everybody, one for you and one for you too"

The Grinch stormed inside one of the cabins only to discover a little Who
The little Who, who was named Cindy Lou Who
Cindy Lou Who stuttered: "You're the... the..."
The Grinch replied while mimicking Cindy: "The... the... THE GRINCH!"

Yet suddenly the Grinch saw the sad little face of Cindy Lou Who
And he had a strange feeling is his chest
"How is this so, what is wrong with this little Who?"
"Why can't you be messed?"

As the Grinch walked outside, he tried to think about it and tried and tried…
And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice cold in the snow,
stood puzzling and puzzling, how could it be so? It came without ribbons.
It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes or bags.
And he puzzled and puzzled 'till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before.
What if Christmas, he thought, doesn't come from a store.
What if Christmas, perhaps, means a little bit more.

And all of and sudden, the Grinch's heart started to grow twice his size.
"Oh no, what I'm I doing to these people" Startled the Grinch
"How could I be so doubtful?"
And the Grinch ran outside, only to discover the menace they all had caused.
He shouted "STOP THIS, NOW" and they all paused

"Look what we are doing to these little whos…"
"They are pretty tasty" the Tarmogoyf replied "Only need some booze"
Felt by guilt, they all let go of the Who
Only the Kird Ape who just couldn't let go out a scary "BOO!"

"I am the Grinch that stole Christmas... and I'm sorry."
A long silence followed
"Aren't you going to cuff me? Beat me up? Blind me with pepper spray?"
"You heard him, Officer. He admitted it. I'd go with the pepper spray." Said Mayor Augustus Maywho
and Officer Wholihan answered "Yes, I heard him all right. He said he was sorry."

Cindy Lou Who who gave a kiss the Grinch on the cheek "Your cheek's so... "
"I know. Hairy" the Grinch said
"No. "
"Greasy? Stinky? Do I have a zit?" said the now confused Grinch
"No. Warm." Cindy Lou Who said with a smile
 
And what happened then? Well, in Whoville they say that the Grinch's small heart grew three sizes that day. And then - the true meaning of Christmas came through, and the Grinch found the strength of *ten* Grinches, plus two!